It’s weird to think about being addicted to something like chaos or mental angst, but it happens.
And, it happens to the best of us.
The ones who do the work, put time into their wellbeing and still, there it sits, mental angst (aka chaos).
It shows up as waiting to put off another thing, to another day. That low level agitation that you just never get things done. There’s too much to do - so much that it’s paralyzing.
You take on too much, then you freeze. Instead of breaking it down into smaller pieces, you let it mutate and grow into something that seems insurmountable.
This addiction to mental angst feeds into the belief systems - I’m a failure, I’ll never be good enough, I’m always behind. Sound familiar?
When we operate (unconsciously) from any of those belief systems or the many others that stem from I’m not worthy, we create situations that match that belief.
So, instead of taking the smaller tasks that you could TOTALLY do in this moment, like right now, you’re here reading this. BUT!!! Wait! This is actually going to be time well spent. I promise.
Instead of adding to the mix and procrastinating, pick your top 3 things that you can get done in the next 30 minutes, next hour, or this day. If you don’t have anything small enough to break down into 3 things, break the biggest thing you have down into three things right now. It may seem impossible, but that is just the belief system. You can do it, you’re just using your mind instead of your body too often.
Those of us who are addicted to mental angst seem to like to spend a lot of time in our heads. The mind doesn’t cope too well with just thinking. It also needs its counterpart, the body, to carry out what it wants to create. This is where we get stuck.
We’re so disconnected from our bodies from thinking all day, that we actually believe we don’t have the energy or skills necessary to complete our endless list that grows day by day by day…… This becomes a familiar feeling, and remember, familiar is what our ego strives for. That’s how we become addicted to suffering from mental angst. Instead of completing what you have to do, you’ll suffer in silence THINKING about it.
This suffering satiates the belief systems mentioned above, and all is well in the ego world. But, what about our Spirit?
The part of ourselves that knows we are capable of so much more. The part of ourselves that doesn’t give a f*ck if it’s “good enough” or not. The part of ourselves that just wants to create, to stop living inside the mind and have a whole, FULL BODIED human experience.
The things that are keeping you paralyzed and keeping you trapped inside your mind are also keeping you separate from your body.
If you are having trouble narrowing down your mental angst, start striking off the things that aren’t yours to worry about. The ones that you have no control over, the ones that are completely, and totally, out of your hands. Make a decision to move your body when these thoughts with no purpose enter your mindspace. Even better, make a decision to do something about the things you can impact (maybe this is one of the smaller tasks to get you going)
When you move your body, you also move your thoughts. The internal landscape starts to have a focus, the nervous system responds by reducing fight or flight (mental angst is the modern day version of facing a bear). You are moving, you are actually DOING SOMETHING! It’s the quickest dose of medicine for the mind.
When you start to do something about the mental angst, this sets up new programming in the un/subconscious (your body memory). Your body begins to create new stories - the ones you actually want to create. The ones that mean something to you, that light you up, that leave you feeling victorious and, dare I say it…….even proud of yourself.
You can see how an old outdated belief system like - I’m not worthy, wouldn’t like that very much. But, I say, who cares! You write the story of your life through your conscious moments, and when you want to get to the subconscious, the nidra brain state is always, always there to support you.
If you want to get curious about nidra in the way that is all encompassing (kind of the only way I do things!), check out my current offerings that teach the medicine of this powerful, persuasive practice of your own free will.