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Fairness Has Left You Suffering And Victimized

Updated: Oct 11, 2023


When you were little, you were taught to be fair. For some of us it landed, and it landed hard. Others have had a little easier time with relaxing the concept of fairness and you’ll notice that they are much more free than you or I.

If you were never taught the concept of fairness, would you find yourself looking around a room and judging each person’s worthiness against yours? If you never understood the concept of fairness would you have found yourself fighting harder to be more?

I am an energy reader and translate as best as I can through the lens of my own humanity. I know that energy is inherently neutral, it does not favor one over the other and it is incredibly ruthless if you’re looking at it from only a human eye.

We suffer when someone good becomes ill and we ask, why them?

We suffer when someone passes and we ask, why them?

We are also suffering when someone other than us does well or has more love and we ask, why them?

Why not me?

When we constantly ask about others and don’t make changes inside ourselves to match the energy of what we want or want to become, we suffer, we wait, we wail, we cry, we feel pain like no one’s felt pain before.

And, none of it makes any difference.

The person who hurt you moves on. The thing that you wanted that you didn’t get is enjoying a life with someone else. None of it matters to anyone but you.

You are needed to make what you want happen. You want to feel loved, love yourself, love others. You want to feel included, let yourself be included, don’t look for ways you are excluded - include others. You want the happily ever after, there’s some decisions only you can make.

Through the lens of fairness, we’ve been taught and have perfectly executed living in a victim mindset.

It’s the mindset that has you slowing down and waiting for someone else to come and save you or the justness of the world to right itself and see, once and for all, just how good of a person you are.

You deserve this good life.

But, are you actively going out and getting it? Are you aligning your behaviors to the behaviors you want to receive, or are you sitting back and feeling hurt by everything that is happening outside of you?

The real work is happening inside. All of that pain that you think you’re experiencing from the outside world is a reflection of what you’re living inside yourself.

You hold the key to how others “make” you feel. If you didn’t feel that way in the first place, it would bounce right off of you and you wouldn’t even notice.

If they, or it, can “make” you feel a certain way, you have a lot of foundational work to do in your reclamation of self love.

There is deep inner work that must take place and it starts with victim consciousness.

You’re not wrong for aligning with this consciousness, we all have it. It’s how often we let ourselves fall into it. Look at how it’s serving you, and realize that you have a choice to believe it or not.

You might think I am being arrogant, someone who doesn’t understand, but I can assure you, I have done a Master’s degree with victim consciousness and it never served me once.

If you were reading energy, it may also look like a person of victim consciousness gets picked on a lot. It seems like they are hurt more often than others and that the world is an unfair place to them.

This again, is a choice. Where attention goes, energy flows. And that is the only law of energy that we need to know.

If you are focused on your suffering, how the world is an unfair place to a good person such as yourself, you will continue to call in more and more. Energy does not care. It is not judging. It’s following the vibration.

I write this not to make you feel bad, but to free you if you are living in victim consciousness.

Don’t get me wrong, on rainy days when the sky is gloomy and nothing goes right, I love diving into my victim consciousness. But, it’s the brief layover there that reminds me to be the energy I want to attract. To hold attention on the things that make me feel loved and the things that make me feel whole.

There is no one in this world outside of you that can make you feel any less than what you are if you refuse to accept it as truth.

You are amazing. You are loved. And, you deserve a life filled with the things you want, you’re just going to have to be the one to acquire them.

Xx Mel

NOTE: We have so much to remember about who we truly are. Most of the suffering that we endure is because of our disconnection from other women and the stories we have told ourselves about vulnerability, love and connection. I am hosting an upcoming retreat for women to connect with other high vibrational, like minded women that are walking the same healing path. If you feel called, I hope you join us.


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